Cassie’s Infertility Story – Not the happy fluffy story

Cassie’s Infertility Story – Intro

This is Cassie from “Glitter with Grace” i’m not sure if you came from
that channel or you’ve known me or whatever the case is I’m just gonna
introduce myself and just let you know a little bit about me.
My name is Cassie moon i am 24 years old and I have been married three years to
my husband Brandon and yeah we’ve had a pretty good life we moved a lot in a
marriage but we’ve had a really good marriage together and one of our biggest
struggles is babies and that’s why we are penning this.
Ok, guys, so yes, I split this into different articles. I have a brain
farts and I have so much I want to say but in this intro i want to put in here
that and other reason why I’m doing this because there’s not a lot of content out
there on infertility, and I’ve sought out sites and youtube for a support
system on this, but everything I came across is all
pretty stories and they’re having babies, which is awesome for them, but I
really was looking for someone who I can relate to with our story.
There’s usually either pray stories, which again is great or
pregnancy blogs, which is also great, but what I was looking for with someone to
relate to — So for this — I’m going to be the one to do it.

I’m from a big family I have lots of brothers and sisters and ever since I was a baby I wanted baby and if you watch our announcement video you hear me say that as a kid I played with dolls constantly i had the stroller, the carseat, the playpen.  I had a whole top bunk full of baby dolls and other toys, so it’s always been
a dream of mine to be a mom.  When I met brandon and we got engaged, I felt
like my whole fairytale was coming to reality and we would get married, go on honeymoon, and then we’re going to have babies right away … but here we are three years later and no babies.  This is infertility discussion, so there’s gonna be a lot of TMI. Heree we go.
Brandon I have never used any type of protection at all. We’ve always thought, well if that happens — it happens.  In my head, if it’s gonna happen, it’s gonna happen, but yeah we were married about a year
when i finally asked, what’s going on? Something isn’t right, we have to figure out what’s going on. In the last year i believe I went to the doctor a little checkup and make sure
everything was okay and he said everything was fine they did some blood
work and I have to go back and he said maybe you’re just not ovulating right
and it looks like your hormone levels are down and it was a progesterone level
and he said I’m going to give you some medicine called clomid well and we’re
going to see if this boost your levels so I took it.
It’s a five-day cycle of pills and yeah I took it and then I went back from the
appointment for more bloodwork and he said oh my gosh here it’s working
perfectly for you my blood work before the clomid my progesterone level was at
gosh if I can remember right 8.5 — i think in the normal level it is between like 15
25 around there 15 to 20 and after the climate I was a 28 so we’re both
thinking oh my gosh this is like we found it right away this is awesome and
so I continue to take it.
Month after month went by and no baby no pregnancy so it’s a little discouraging.
You know it’s hard to see everyone else around you get pregnant at ease and
I want to crack but um yeah since it’s always been a dream of mine to have kid
imprint of you us.
Don’t cry for me — it’s — I was really — i’m depressed and you know sad about it a
lot and I have more videos to film for good with grace after this I can’t cry.
um yeah it’s just been really hard for me mentally and through my marriage we
know its attention in our marriage and for at times I just don’t know what to
do but um you know it’s been i’ve been on climate for a year and actually this
month i just stopped because it’s not working it makes me a crazy person and
yeah so I’m just gonna figure out what else to do.
I also want to say that bring and I haven’t really been diagnosed with any
certain type of infertility but again it’s been three years have not been able
to get pregnant so and other than the doctor saying me not ovulating correctly
that’s been our only diagnose problem but it should have happened with
climate so I’m so yeah I’m gonna be going to the doctor to get a second
opinion soon so i’ll probably take you along with me on that journey kind of
blog a little bit if my videos are just going to be pretty much me talking or
topics to help you if you’re struggling with this ways to help you in your
marriage when you’re feeling this way I’m different methods to help you relax
and just take your mind off of everything.
yeah just different tips health tips everything these videos are just going
to be me sharing with you how i’m getting through it and maybe helping you
get through it.
yeah and another note is it’s really hard for me to open that publicly about
my feelings i usually only share feelings of the few choice people and my
true heart with a few toys people so yeah I really feel like this is what I
need to be doing this is there’s always a purpose for pain and I feel like I
need to find my purpose for what I’m going through to get what I want I mean
it’s not like oh I do this I’m gonna get a baby but I’m i feel like this is truly
what God has been putting on my heart for a while now and with Mandy’s
pregnancy she wants to do pregnancy blogs and she was like hey you should do
videos infertility and that was just total confirmation for me because I’ve
been wanting to do it but I’ve been scared i had didn’t tell anyone i think
maybe my husband because again i am it’s hard for me to share my feelings
publicly because i don’t want to show a weakness i guess i want to show them
strong but you know I’ve learned through the thought process of these videos that
it’s okay to be weak in I am strong her by doing these videos i hope to share my
story and encourage you guys.
Out there or to gain more prayers and again a bigger prayer chain and i know
that god will give us a baby at least one but i’m not sure but in the meantime
I’m going to work hard on encouraging others and making my marriage hundred
times better and I’m building friendships through this and learning a
lot of stuff and who knows what this will bring I hope big things i’m going
to be sharing a lot of scriptures with you guys I’m to pray over your life for
songs even I’m really i love music when I’m happy sad mad anything but I’m music
really helped me get through the day I guess there’s a song i mentioned the two
videos already on glitter with great and it’s i will trust you by Brandon Katie
torwalt and oh my gosh it’s amazing because it’s it says over and over i
will trust you all my hope is found in your love and that’s just awesome like
out I’m going to trust him all my hope and faith is found in him and him only
and it’s just an amazing song and there’s billions of other songs that I
love to listen to to help me get through stuff that I’m and i’ll definitely share
them.
There’s a few things I wanted to share and i’ll be talking about statistics
with infertility just to make myself more knowledgeable and you out there
knowledgeable the anger the frustration to hurt i’m just going to be really raw
and open and have different topics or videos and this is also going to be kind
of like a video diary for me it’s almost like a sophistry then as well as being
wanted to help others and gain some friends through this but I think it’ll be really cool for not only
my testimony later on but for my kids to see in the future how badly I wanted
them in my life and how hard I fought for them so they can watch these
and yeah so I am being positive and hopeful that baby moon will be here
someday and then you’ll be all enough to watch these videos and see that I wanted
you with all my heart.
If you have any suggestions for me if you’re going through this or know
somebody or just have an idea for me i would love it i’m going to be making a
website to go along with this page and with written stuff and links to my
videos like a blog and i’m trying to come up with a name for this not just
Cassie moon i think a name would be pretty cool like i don’t know i like the
word transparent but i can’t rhyme it or match it with anything and I want to do
like a special intro video i have big dreams and big visions for this channel
so yeah I want to do pictures and I just want to put my whole heart into this
channel and to helping you out there and I’m really excited
so yeah leave your ideas for me help me find a name picked out a name for me
help me.
I just don’t know I’m not good at coming up with names for stuff I am really
cheesy and I thought about transparent love which I don’t know it’s kind of
cute but yeah I am excited for this and I’m a little scared but I know you out
there going to be supportive and loving and help me through this time and my
testimony it’s gonna be out for the world to see and
ok i’ll be holding a little baby in my videos to show you that God is amazing
so I hope you enjoy this little intro to my channel
stay tuned for more and i love you guys.

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